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Dating Site Review:

June 1st, 2011 by

OkCupid is the world’s most popular free dating website. Unlike other dating sites like and, which require you to pay monthly, you can use (nearly) the full extent of OKCupid’s features completely for free (they make most of their money on advertisements like Google and Facebook do). If you’re interested, there is a paid “A-list” account upgrade available, which makes your profile more prominent in search results and earns you a couple of other perks, but you can easily get by without it.

User-Created Quizzes

The core of OKCupid’s profile matching system are its user-created profile questions. You can answer as many questions as you’d like, or invent your own. For each question you indicate your own answer, and then choose the answer(s) you will deem acceptable for a potential match. You can also choose how important the question is to you.

The more questions you answer, the more it tailors your profile and your search results, and the more likely you are to get a solid match.

Here’s an example of some of OKCupid’s user-created quiz questions…

I selected “I never have!”, “No”, and “Only after the wedding”, respectively. And then I decided that anybody I would date should feel the same so I selected the same answers under the “Answers I’ll accept” category. I then decided that the question was “Mandatory.” You can also choose “Very important,” “Somewhat important,” “A little important,” and “Irrelevant.”

For all questions, OK Cupid asked me if I would like to answer the questions privately. I didn’t mind if they were public so I left those boxes unchecked. You can also add an explanation to any question you answer. I could have attached a note that said “I’m waiting till marriage to have sex, but I’d consider kissing, etc. after a few dates if I really liked the person.”

Searching for People

The site matches users based on their activities on the site as well as their answers to questions. Users can also search for matches based on their match percentage (how much they have in common) as well as age, religion, and location.

I didn’t post a photo so I can’t say much about the “Quickmatch” feature but it compares your profile picture to someone else’s and each user rates the other on a ‘five star’ scale. Users that are consistently rated higher are provided with more attractive matches. A-List (paid) users can search by star ratings as well.

I did have some complaints regarding the WTM crowd. I performed a search and specified the location as ‘anywhere’ to include, in theory, every user on OkCupid. I limited the search as much as possible to include people who were waiting. I found very few profiles and those that were waiting were usually religious. I answered questions specifically to weed out any potential matches that weren’t waiting but I don’t feel like my questions were taken seriously.

I specified “Mandatory” on many of my questions regarding sex and many of my matches weren’t even close in that category. OkCupid matches users on ethics, sex, religion, lifestyle and dating. Many of my matches were good fits ethically but not sexually. I wish I could have picked an emphasis on which category I was matched on. For those who are WTM I feel like the ‘sex’ category would get potential matches in the door and then we could talk ethics and so forth.

The Quiver

OkCupid has another feature, the quiver, that provides users with 3 matches. All of my matches have been pretty poor. Many of them are single mothers. I don’t have anything against single mothers but they certainly don’t line up with my uber-virgin profile and I am in no way mature enough to be dating someone with a kid.

Overall Impressions

Overall OkCupid offers a lot of nice features for free. I would recommend using the site to meet people and make friends but not for serious dating. It’s less focused on getting couples married and more focused on getting people together. Although it doesn’t seem like there’s many people who are waiting, this could be chalked up to how shy users are. I would guess that most people who are waiting don’t fly that flag very high.

19 Responses to “Dating Site Review:”

  1. Kaitlin says:

    I’m always so unsure of online dating sites. It’s hard for me to know if we really have chemistry and can be ourselves if we can’t meet in person, but thanks for this review. 🙂

  2. James says:

    I’ve had an OKC account for a while. This seems to be a pretty good review of the site. I contacted them a couple months ago about incorporating the ability to designate a couple of questions as so-called “deal-breakers.” I quickly received a positive response but haven’t heard anything since.
    I’ve found very few people who are WTM, even who are “very serious” about whatever religion they are. I used to have it displayed prominently that I’m WTM and got numerous messages complementing me on the decision and being so upfront about it, but the sender usually didn’t feel the same way or lived far too far away.
    That being said, it IS a good site for meeting people in general; I’ve made a couple friends.

  3. Leo says:

    Thanks for the comments! Kaitlin, I know what you mean about chemistry. Some people tend to communicate better non-verbally and drop the ball in person. I think that given enough time you can get a pretty good picture of someone though.

    James, I’m glad you agree. I like the idea of a ‘deal-breaker’ feature, that would be very cool for the WTM crowd. I had a similar experience with people telling me it was admirable but not for them. People need to be proud that they’re waiting so we can find them easier in searches!

    Make sure to check out the forums for lively discussion and like-minded people!

  4. Allie says:

    I have an OKCupid account, but I only made it for their personality quizzes.

  5. lo says:

    The truth is OK Cupid is pretty shallow with a lot of woman that are single for a reason. My advice is don’t care, just have fun with it. But its like approaching a hot woman. These woman have alot of men just messaging them the same stuff over and over again especially the hot ones. So unless you are funny, get lucky, or very attractive or 6’2+ you won’t get much results from attractive women.

    There was a funny story I read of a guy who went on there and messaged people for a long period and got no replies. Then he developed a completely different profile with a picture of a model saying he was 6 foot 4. He got messaged by dozens of people in a short period of time. He then went back on there and updated the profile to say that the model cheated on his exgirlfriends and had a kid he neglected. Woman still contacted him. Not all women are great people but then again not all women on ok cupid are bad people.

  6. Leo says:

    Ha that story is disturbing! I can’t believe he wrote that he cheated on his exes, and neglected his kid, and women still contacted him! I guess that does go to show that okcupid is just as bad as any other dating site. You’re right about not all women being bad people on the site but the good ones are so hard to find! I guess your initial advice will have to do until dating sites are perfected. Thanks for the comment! Check us out on the forums, we have a solid little community on there that’s always looking forward to new members!

  7. Liz says:

    At first I thougt the site was really great, as I progressed I noticed it caters to men (women are supposed to make initial contact). This to me is not impressive as I am a senior and although I did make several attempts, I found that the majority of men on the site were NOT marriage minded. The LTR relationships give them selves away (at least they are honest) when answering some of the questions, when a man says he seeks a LTR, he is telling you he wants someone but does not want to commit. This is fine if your a female looking for the same type of situation. If your a female looking for a potential marriage relationship, lots of luck with that. In my opinion a waste of time.

    It is interesting site but very time consuming with Q&A which supposedly is how they get a percentage of a rating for you and the other person. In my opinion the majority of guys on the site should also invest in a razor. Some more so a lawn mower. Yet they do expect woment to shave their legs. Give me a break, I don’t go for facials to have my face torn up by barb wire beards, thanks I will pass. It is more of a site to get a few laughs from responses than any real dating unless you want to lower your standards. On the positive the site itself is well presented and easy to use, too bad there are really not many marriage potential men on it.

  8. anon says:

    VERY insightful Liz, and i laughed at your beard comment – i always wonder about guys with hair issues – this is a great site by the way

  9. frank says:

    Well I do not know how yall do it, but since I have created my account there, no one have ever contacted me which is weird…I have people only visiting..

  10. Jai says:

    Ok so let me first say, that I agree with the review of ok Cupid. It is not a site to be taken seriously for dating, but it’s great to meet friends with common interest or views. It doesn’t get intimate with questions and is pretty gritty. The same way you would act with your fiends haha. But I must also admit, I inynhad my ok Cupid account for about two weeks. I made two UHMAZING friends while I was there. And also ended up marrying my husband after meeting on that site. Yep. I
    Married someone I met on OKCupid.

    But know this, by okcupids statistics, we were enemies. Basically he was new to town (it’s kinda desolate) and hadn’t
    Met many new people because of his job, and me being (at the time) in roller derby, he inquired about where and when, since he wanted to watch bouts. We emailed like 2 times and I already disliked the guy. I ignored him. Then advised I was deleting my account, and he emailed me his number stating he really wanted to find new stuff to do in our area. Welp after about three Months texting and chatting we met. I hated him again. But he totally savedme one day and we spent an entire month together. He was the most amazing man ever. We’ve been together very day since. And got married in July. I’ve never been happier with anyone in my entire life. And although we met online, okcupid voted against us. So basically I never would have met my husband had I not been online, but also had i heeded the okcupid statistics of only 32 percent compatibility, I’d never have met my mister. It was spot on, and I mean SPOT ON for friends, but couldn’t have been more incorrect for marriage (in my case) and he is totally so much like myself, I don’t understand how he wasn’t at least listed as my friend.

    Needless to say, I’m gracious for the site, but it still just boils down to chance.

  11. Google@MissChristiLuv says:

    lol OKCupid is fun to make new friends but Ive never made a real romantic relationship from it lol. Feel free to friend me there if you’d like tho haha ^_^ Im @ – See ya! 🙂

  12. Catie says:

    I’m a college sophomore and I actually met the guy I’m currently dating on OKCupid. I’ve always believed in abstinence and my profile reflects that. Though the guy I’m dating isn’t a virgin, his past experiences have led him to want to wait til marriage for future sexual relations. Our match percentage was exceptionally high (94%) and so far our interactions have supported that. Honestly, I never would have thought I’d be seriously dating somebody I met online as OKCupid seems more like a site for meeting people, and casual dating but as you can see you never know.

  13. Fernando says:

    Thank you for sharing Catie. That is a pretty amazing story, your a virgin who is willing to date a non-virgin that has changed his life and want to wait till marriage. Anyway, I would really appreciate you providing further input on this. Why would you (as a Waiter) be willing to date a guy who is not a virgin? Can you really trust him? Do you find him admirable or honorable that he learned from his mistakes? The reason why I’m asking is because I’m not a virgin but I am now living an abstinence life style and will hit my 3rd anniversary on December 2014. The first year was a struggle for me, honestly I really did not want to go through this. But shortly after I accepted Jesus Christ as my lord and savior and surrendered my will to him, God put it in my heart to take the next leap of faith, and that is to wait till marriage. And I’m feeling stronger approaching my third year. But my first year I almost gave into the temptation. So how long has your boyfriend been waiting? Can you trust him? And why would you be willing to give something so sacred as your virginty to him who is not a virgin?

    I have not been on OKCupid but it sounds pretty shallow, I’ve tried ChristianMingle and Zoosk and honestly I’m surprised that even on Christian Mingle it’s hard to find someone “attractive” who is abstaining until marriage as well. I don’t feel like a deserve a virgin girl but I do know that I will not date someone who is not waiting for marriage. Because I’m not a virgin, I will give the girl a break and don’t require her to be a virgin either, as long as she has changed somewhere along her journey to wait until marriage, and I would prefer if she’s been waiting longer than two years, because anything less I dot feel is a good track record that she is serious enough. However, I also feel that if I was a virgin, I would absolutely require for the girl to be a virgin too. And therefore, I have mix feelings of approaching a girl who is attractive and a virgin because I feel as if I’m not good enough, and even if she accepts me, her parents and especially her father won’t. Again, I would really appreciate your feedback!

  14. grace says:

    Hi leo

    Thanks for sharing from a guy’s perspective.
    I respect your WTM decision/choice.

    WTM has become really rare these days unless one is a true Chrstian abiding in Godly principles regarding marriage (thats my stand also) 🙂

    What I seen and experienced from okcupid were guys dating for casual sex /cohabitation and thats a put-off

  15. Dee says:

    I met a Christian man on OKCupid.. Single, no kids, great looking, funny… and pastor! I thought wow!! Finally!! Someone who gets me and my christian / conservative values on sexual intimacy! I was quickly very disappointed to find out his liberal standards and how he made everything about sex debatable and flexible. I was disappointed yet I looked more. I found another perfect match Christian guy… in my area, praise and worship leader at a great church! I love Christian music and we were both excited we ‘met’. I thought wow how awesome!!! After a little research I found out he is in a relationship… :-/ So, honestly I kind of lost hope! I know God has a plan so I trust His plan and His timing instead.. 🙂

  16. Stella says:

    I was looking some resource for meeting, where people really wanted to find true love. And I’ve found heaven for online meeting! It is I wish all of you to find this pleasure!

  17. Stella says:

    I recommend this resource all of people who want find true love – And I wish all single be happy and find each other)

  18. Christian says:

    Wait till marriage

  19. just a lonely girl says:

    Im giving up on love and relationships im worth nothing but only to myself

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