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Episode 5: The WTM Couple

May 25th, 2014 by

Life is strange now.

I’ve been going out for my boyfriend for a year – and we haven’t had a single issue in regards to WTM. In fact, he believes the same thing as I do. I can’t believe that I ever felt uncomfortable about waiting for marriage – since it’s something that he respects.

It’s actually something we rarely talk about anymore – because we’re having too much fun. We’re both very extroverted and opinionated, we go to dinners, to parties, we dance together, we watch movies together, we volunteer together – and life is great.

And yes, we still have a lot of chemistry.

It makes it so much easier when someone has the same beliefs as you…

There are certain habits that we have adopted in order to make sure that we don’t do anything that we regret – the major one being that we don’t visit each other’s apartments alone. This may not be the answer for everyone – but you know your own weaknesses and your own limits. Personally, I feel like there is so much you can do in life with coffee shops, restaurants, museums, libraries, canoeing…

We haven’t told any of our friends that we are WTM – because frankly, it’s none of their business :)

But I’ve learned a lot about life through university, and working life. Breaking up with somebody, or deciding not to date someone because of that person’s doubts behind WTM is hard, and sad. But doing something that you regret is much more difficult, because chances are, you’ll probably remember the actions you regret years from now. So you might as well live a lifestyle that keeps you at peace – even if it’s a lifestyle that a minority choose to keep You’ll still be a lot happier… because you’ll be more satisfied with your own actions.

Always follow your principles… even if they seem too different from others’ principles. At the end of the day, you’re going to judge yourself based on your own actions.

And to be honest – we are never, never alone.

I never thought that I’d end up with another virgin…

I never thought that I’d end up with another virgin. I always took it for granted that the person I’d date would have more experience than myself. It was mainly because I thought virgins were like unicorns – and didn’t realize how many of them actually existed. I really didn’t care about whether my future husband was a virgin – so long as I was WTM myself.

But I have to say – it makes it so much easier when someone has the same beliefs as you, or is at least extremely supportive of your own beliefs. No more arguing, no more pressuring, no more feeling like you’re abnormally traditional. Just … peace.

Both of us are quite relaxed in our own skin now. I wonder how people would react if they knew that we have gone out for a whole year – and we are still waiting for marriage. They’d probably look shocked – because we don’t fit the stereotype.

But how many virgins really fit a stereotype? Happy, not-bad-looking, fun-loving, talkative, career-oriented, educated, extroverted, twenty-something year old… virgins?

I’m not ashamed to be waiting for marriage. Nor do I expect anyone else to wait.

But if I may say so – I’m pretty proud of myself.

My name is Selina, and I am a 26 year old waiting for marriage – and so happy that I made that choice.

Author: Selina

Selina is a self-described "happy-go-lucky 25 year old Muslim city girl/prankster who likes to serve the world with a big mischievous grin." She's also a full-time Canadian pharmacist who is very passionate about healthcare.

When she's not researching therapeutic breakthroughs, she's a singer, lyricist, ice hockey enthusiast, Glee fan, and Bollywood addict, who loves to dress up, and strap on a pair of heels. Selina is focused on following her own chosen lifestyle, but is also a huge champion of pluralism and accepting diversity of belief.

4 Responses to “Episode 5: The WTM Couple”

  1. J says:

    There is a distinction between dating someone who is a virgin and someone who is WTM. A person can be a virgin and just waiting for the “right time” and that may not have to be marriage in their eyes. Conversely, someone can willingly have sex with one or more people they aren’t married to, then decide to go the WTM route. Of course, many people who frequent this site fall into that category. They sometimes are referred to as secondary virgins or born again virgins or something like that. Some people are not technically waiters, but are willing to wait to be with some who is a waiter. At the end of the day, virginity is about your past and waiting is about the time between making the conscious decision to wait and marriage.

  2. Jenn says:

    Selina,

    I think you’re me. :) Seriously, this is exactly the way I feel. I couldn’t have said it any better.

  3. meandmyfaith says:

    I’ve read yours posts and they’re rencouraging, thks for shairing.By the way I’m happy you’ve found a WTM like you, I wish the same for me.

  4. Vick Macky says:

    Can someone please help? I have been emailing and leaving messages and nobody is responding. people are not getting the confirmation emails! take a look at when the last new member signed up.

    I would love to join this site but it looks like you’re experiencing some major tech issues.

    Someone please email me back at vick.macky@mail.com

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